Orgasm control

Orgasm control (also known as extended orgasm) is a sexual technique involving an active partner taking control over a passive partner's orgasm. The technique can be used by anybody regardless of sexual orientation.

Typically, an active partner will give slow, gentle stimulation to the passive partner, gradually bringing them up to the point very high in the plateau phase where an orgasm is actually building, but will then reduce the level of stimulation just below that needed to trigger the orgasm. By carefully varying the intensity of stimulation, the passive partner is held in this highly-aroused state near to orgasm. This process may be repeated as desired during intercourse, but repetition causes the passive partner's urge to orgasm can become overwhelming. When the active partner eventually provides the passive partner with enough stimulation to achieve an orgasm, the climax itself may be stronger than usual due to the increased tension and arousal that builds up during the extended stimulation.

The aim of orgasm control is to prolong the powerful sexual sensations that occur during the final build-up to orgasm. It is a form of negative feedback. The physical demands of being kept in this highly-excited state for a time can induce a very pleasurable, almost euphoric state in the passive partner. An active partner may derive pleasure from witnessing his/her partner in such an excited state.

Orgasm control requires a degree of skill in the active partner. It is a slightly advanced sexual technique which calls for enough familiarity to be able to react to a partner's responses, and vary intensity and timing of genital stimulation accurately. The variation and control of timed stimuli produces the effect of the "controlled partner" being on the verge of orgasm without climaxing. This stimulation continues until slightly increased to arrive at orgasm in the partner being stimulated.

The experience of orgasm control is tied into sexual bondage BDSM in some instances. If this occurs, the delineation between controlling and controlled partner become slightly more evident. This is because restraint for pleasure is one of the main goals of this sexual preference.

Orgasm control differs from the BDSM practices of orgasm denial, tie and tease and tease and denial where the aim is the giving and receiving of the intensely pleasurable sensations involved, and the period of control is limited to a single encounter which ends in orgasm.

Because individual masturbation allows for precise control over the feelings and timing of stimulation, many people practice certain forms of orgasmic control by themselves. A technique known as "stop-and-go" or "edging" is where one will masturbate up until the moment before reaching the plateau phase after which point orgasm occurs, stopping suddenly before experiencing a climax. Many report that repeating this technique several times during a single masturbation results in a stronger, more intense climax when experiencing an orgasm.

An experience of orgasm control is described in the section called "slow masturbation" in the popular book The Joy of Sex, but any method of stimulation (such as oral sex, sex toys or slow penetration) can be used by the active partner, not just manual stimulation.

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